The end of this school year is pretty bittersweet for me and also really irregular. Granted, I'm only a year in so regular isn't really my area of expertise, but there's been some crazy things that have happened to me in the last week. So.
I keep writing dumb posts and then deleting them because words just seem to not be my friend lately. However, it looks to me that if I write a billion really stupid ones, I'm sure to find a winner in there somewhere. And well, I guess here we are? I mean, we'll find out one way or another because either you'll read this or you won't.
Anyway, moving on.
My classroom is empty, the chairs are all stacked and art supplies are all boxed up for next year's students to wreak all sorts of havoc with. I sat in front of my computer today, after a long couple of hours of collaboration with the other two art teachers for the district and there's potential for me to just move to the other school instead of being completely out of a job. God will provide something, I just know it. Mostly because something always shows up right when I need it most.
I'm a bit wishy washy between wanting to continue teaching and wanting to try something else. Looking back at how this year went, and how a majority of the time I would come home and wish I could just give it all up as I cried in the shower, and then! You know what happens? I buy a yearbook to commemorate my first year teaching and those stinking little brats filled it all up with words of love and encouragement that I will find something else and that they'll miss me to pieces and that I'm their favorite teacher or that I helped them get through some pretty rough stuff in their lives and well, shoot. Just tug on my feels a little harder, will you?
One of the things that cost me the opportunity to be re-hired is my lack of self confidence. Admittedly, I struggle in this area a lot and even though I try not to let it show, it's just one of those things. I have abilities way beyond what I give myself credit for, and you know, self confidence will improve with experience in my profession. But those yearbook entries, dude. It's an incredible self confidence boost. I never set out to affect that many people or to impact that many lives. I just showed up to work and made geeky, nerdy jokes about art and asked my students how their day went and what they did for the weekend. I know I'm not the traditional teacher, and sometimes I get a lot of flack for that from other teachers in my building, but as long as the kids are learning the kids and are happy, then I guess it doesn't matter.
So now I'm going to take my summer and paint my heart out. Maybe start an etsy shop to sell some event and holiday cards. And write more articles about lots of different things. Basically, just do whatever the heck I want to because I can. This is my life and I'm going to live it.
(pictures of my busy life, in chronological order...or at least I think they are...)
i got a tattoo touch up and addition. the birds really needed to be fixed.
dress fitting and bridal shower for my lovely soon to be sister in law!
(a month and two days away, butwhoscounting)
first day of school selfie and last day of school selfie
aaaaand daniel graduated! to the kid we wondered if he ever really would make it all the way through, i give you a hearty congrats. i can't believe that you're old enough to be graduated from high school, or more likely, that I'm old enough for you to have graduated from high school ;)