Friday, May 23, 2014

YEAH...SO THERE'S THAT

So, sometimes super ridiculous things happen and then I have to write 8 bajillion blog posts before I come up with one actually worth publishing. I mean, creative process and all. You can't rush art, is what. At least, I suppose that's what.

Well, to start off, I should say that a short while ago I was alerted to the fact that the school I work at was cutting the budget for the art department and going down to one full time position. They were just going to open up that position to me and the other art teacher to keep it all fair. And so then on Monday I had a really quick six question what's your vision for the future of the program kind of interview and on Wednesday I found out that they picked not-me.

So.

My brain kind of tumbled around in my head and water leaked out of my eyes for a couple days afterwards. I mean, I felt like someone had just broken up with me! This future of art works and students and grading and making that danged art room as cool as I possibly could were just shattered in about a five second span and one awful sentence, "Natalie, I'm afraid it's bad news..." Well, shoot.

I just got real mopey, and I mean look, yes, I kind of hated my job some days, so maybe it's kind of a relief that I don't have to go back next year? But then also it takes three years, three real hard years of your life to actually fall in love with teaching. I wasn't ready to give up yet. I mean, not that this necessitates giving up, but it's gonna be a lot harder for me to find another teaching job now. It would have been easier for the other teacher, since you know, more experience and all. But this is life, and since when does life do the things you want it to? Right.

Yesterday afternoon my roommate and I palled around town and I guess that was just exactly what I needed to start to feel better about this whole being jobless and without a paycheck at the end of the summer thing. We made appointments to get tattoos. Well, I'm getting my shoulder tattoo fixed and Kelsey is getting her own first tattoo and things! It's super exciting!

And then we stole delicious chocolate chip cookies from her aunt before going to the Fisherman's Market for dinner. I've never eaten at the Fisherman's Market before but Kelsey told me she'd heard the fish and chips were really good, so naturally we both ordered the same thing. Except she got salmon and I got mahi-mahi and we both got four different dipping sauces. And then we traded fish because, let me just say that we both love salmon and all but hey, salmon was not made for fish sticks, fyi.

Plus, the weather yesterday was exactly what the beginning of summertime is all about. Kelsey put a blanket down out on our porch and I just kind of laid there talking to her while she started painting a lawn ornament for her mom. It was probably the best ending to that day I could imagine. I mean, just saying.

Also, today is Friday so hooray for the weekend! And since Memorial Day is a thing, that means no school on Monday. Hello long lazy weekend made out of awesome and win and all that good stuff. So maybe even though things are kind of sucky, there is still that silver lining.

I don't know what the future holds, but I know who holds the future and since this is real life and all, let the adventures continue. Maybe I'll go sideways or backward, but eventually I'll go forward again and really, I'm trying not to be too worried about it. There are two weeks left of school and I'm gonna enjoy the crap out of them. It's gonna be a thing.

3 comments:

  1. Aw, wow :-/ I'm very sorry to hear this. How frustrating and unexpected. But, as cheesy and unhelpful as it might sound, everything happens for a reason. I think that maybe this is going to direct you to opportunities you wouldn't have noticed or had otherwise.

    Just try to keep enjoying life and keep your eyes open :) And I'm always glad to talk to you about anything and everything!

    ~Stephanie

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  2. That sucks about the job Natalie. I'll be praying for you, and try to have an enjoyable end of the year

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  3. God's plan is best. Chin up!

    I'm praying

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