But I have been doing some thinking lately. And by lately I mean in the past ten minutes. I was on Facebook, you see. And I was vainly staring at my own profile because just sometimes I have to do that. I like to look at my profile and try to think of how what's said on there influences what other people think about me. I'm such a cool kid, I know.
And then I was thinking about those status updates from one year ago today used to pop up on the side of the page and I realized that I am in a completely different place now than I was then. I mean, but isn't this always the case? Aren't we always in a different place a year later? I am definitely not a Ms. Havasham of the world.
Last year I was hurrying to screen print my Poogies in all their striped glory and get a birthday present for the PC. This year I am painting and graphic designing and two month anniversarying with somebody-very-important. Two months I have mixed feelings about. One month is kind of a big deal only because you are there all of a sudden scratching your head going "where has all the time disappeared to?" But two months! Two months is nothing to spit at in the grand scheme of things. It's like the Tuesday of anniversary celebrations. Mostly I am not a celebrator of the anniversaries when they are still in month format. I think the being together of the 1 month, the 6 months, and the year are really the only ones worth mentioning.
As it is, a year ago I wasn't the same person that I am today. I went back to read my October 2010 blog posts and I couldn't bring myself to get all the way through them. Mostly because they involved you-know-who and since the big blow up this summer I'm not so keen on bringing him back into my life in written form or otherwise. I mean, sometimes we text but it's really not a lot and I don't hardly ever see him. Which honestly I think is for the best. At least for now.
I think it will be fun though, to look back on myself in another year and see just how different things are then. I will be student teaching if everything goes according to planned. And I will no longer be in Moscow at school. And who knows if I will still even be friends with my somebody-very-important! There is so much that's up in the air! But at the same time, that's what helps make life so exciting. You don't have all the answers and you never will. And that's scary, but also thrilling. So very liberating.
i agree. exciting and frightening.
ReplyDeleteit happened to me too and sometimes I get really embarassed what I wrote about a year ago and how it all doesn't matter anymore...