Word Rambling And More Paint Hate

It occurred to me that I have yet to post anything since April started, and well, that's just a shame. It's not that I've been too busy to write anything, it's just that every time I sit down in front of my computer and enter blogworld, all of the contents of my brain escape.

My fingers start getting ahead of my mind, and then I start omitting words from sentences, typing letters out of order, and well, it just ends up being riotous and forcing me to get out the pitchfork and lanterns while assembling a small militia of grammar warriors to round everything back up. I wish it was as fun as it sounds, but believe me, word-wrangling is actually quite perilous at best. One may end up with paper cuts, and we all know fun those are.

But in all seriousness, I really have been up to a lot of nothing. And by nothing I mean lounging around knee deep in homework and painting and charcoal, and I just can't even tell you what color my hands are supposed to be anymore. Sometimes they are green and blue and brown and sometimes I think I'm turning into a Labrador from 101 Dalmatians. At the moment I am human toned, but who knows how long that will last?

Probably until tomorrow at about 2:30 in the afternoon when my painting class begins. It will all be downhill from there you know. First it will start off with a smidgen of this color, a dollop of that, and before you know it I'm a rainbow. Lovely. And you know what else? None of my colors will match what they're supposed to match, because I am just that good at painting, you know.

They teach you in art classes throughout the years that great artists are never understood during their life times. A lot of famous artists were "bad" at art in school too, they had teachers who told them they should just quit and take up dentistry or some such line of garbage. I think that means I must just be really great at art, since my artwork almost always looks absolutely and entirely nothing like anyone else's artwork in any of my classes.

At least that must mean I'm just awesome enough to have my own style? I think yes, definitely.

But really, as the years go by and the more art classes I have under my belt, I'm starting to realize that I really don't create art the same way these other art students do. I wish I had pictures of my classmates artwork to show you, because some of them are simply amazing. And trust me, it's not that I don't think my artwork is amazing and I'm not putting myself down, but my pieces just don't look like theirs do. And that leaves me wondering, what exactly am I doing differently?

And maybe that doesn't matter. I create what I create and it looks how it looks whether or not it looks like how I want it to, or maybe how my instructor wants it to. But at least I do it, right? That counts, right? I mean, my colors may not match, and my texture might be different, but I just put my own spin on the original. I'm an artist like that.

Really, I don't even know where to begin. I think it's just atrocious, and I kind of hate it a lot, honestly. The people are my favorite part, but if I could just scrap this whole thing I would. Remember how I told you that I'm not great at mixing and matching colors? Here is your proof.

There are some things I like about this painting, but I'm not really proud of it. I'm not too upset though, because we have several more projects in the next couple of weeks, so I think I'll have more than enough chances to redeem myself.

I mean, we'll see what happens.