A HEARTY THANKS

I feel like I say this every year, but this year feels especially fast. Maybe it's just the second half of the year that has been so incredibly...unique, or it could just be that time passes faster the older you become. I mean, not that it really matters anyway.

But since this year has been totally out of the norm, it's shaped me in ways I didn't know I could move. It's stretched me and grown me and pulled me in different directions. It's made me more confident in some areas and also shattered other parts of me beyond recognition. And I guess that's what happens when you go out into the world and try to be a functioning adult. Limits get tested, patience is worn thin, grace and humility become your best friends and you are forced to figure shit out. Welcome to adulthood.

As weird as it sounds though, it's actually something I really enjoy. This year I lost a job in the stupidest way possible and had all sorts of negative things spread about me (I can only assume, based on the situation, as it was not peaceful) which was a complete and utter first in the Natalie department. But through that situation I came out with a different and better sense of self.

As an artist, I started designing fabrics and have even sold some to people who are not my family - which is, as they say, the mark of success. As a girlfriend, I got to understand just how much Nathan loves me through all the stress that we've dealt with the past few months. As a daughter, I have witnessed just how much my parents care about me and my wellbeing and how readily they will sacrifice for me when I need them to. As an employee, I have learned that it's not the amount of money you make, it's the experience you get doing it. Which could also be in the art category too, you know, starving artist and all.

So as we've just finished Thanksgiving and are about to head into the Christmas season, I have been filled with a spirit of thanksgiving. Or at least I want to be filled with a spirit of thanksgiving but sometimes I am filled with a spirit of hunger and crankiness - I am only human after all.

But I'm thankful for quite a few things this year, including but not limited to: my family, who keep surprising me in all the best ways; all my friends, who are supporting me in all my artistic endeavors or who listen to me rant about things without judgment, (you guys are amazing!); my oma, who has supported me and offered a lot of advice and who has been my biggest cheerleader when it comes to designing fabrics and creating art; and Nathan, who is so much more to me than a boyfriend and even when I'm crabby and impossible, for whatever reason, he still loves me and surprises me with little things all the time. I couldn't have asked for anyone better to have by my side.

And as we head into the land of greens and reds and jingly bells, while you are all taking the time to make a unique gift or thoughtfully pick one out at a store, remember who it is you're buying for and why you are so thankful for them.

Christmas tends to make me really grinchy and irritated with all the people in all the stores buying all the things and paying absolutely no mind to the world around them. Sometimes I get so annoyed feeling like I'm the only one paying attention to my surroundings, that I lose track of the fact that these are humans too. And they are somebody's mom, grandma, dad, sister, brother, aunt or uncle. And they deserve to be treated like a human being too.

So goosfraba this holiday season, my friends. And a Happy Christmas to you!

LOOKING BACK

Well happy November, nerds! I honestly thought I'd be able to squeeze one more post in October out before the change of months and then, boo. You know how it is.

So now for a horrible transitional paragraph, I went to Moscow for Halloween this year and it was a pretty rad ordeal. It's been entirely too long since I visited that dinky little town and it was almost exactly just how I remembered it.

Except now they have a Buffalo Wild Wings and a Panda Express.

But we ate at Sangria instead because the avocado rolls and sirloin empanadas! And they lived up to everything I remembered them to be plus a little bit extra. If you ever find yourself in Moscow, do yourself a favor and hit up Sangria. It's a little on the spendy side, but oh so deliciously worth it. And to finish, for dessert you'll want the sweet potato creme brûlée. Just trust me on this one.

After dinner we sported our costumes and posed for pictures before heading out with a group of friends to do a halloween pub crawl. It was windy and rainy and completely packed with college kids around every corner, standing room only thankyouverymuch.

And the costumes! So many costumes of every variety! From crappily completed homemades to extravagantly executed store bought creations, there were such an incredible display of creativity that it caused me to spend most of the night people watching. Which is to say that I had loads of fun.

But aside from all the Halloween shenanigans, I just really enjoy being back in Moscow. I don't know what it is about that town, but I crave it every now and then. It makes me wish I was back in school. It makes me wish I could just walk around the down town and hang out in the coffee shops and eat a bagel. It makes me want to walk through the mall and hit up the Ross Dress For Less and get some pretzel bites. It makes me want to drive to the campus and walk through the arboretum, where I used to spend so much time.

So much of my growing up happened in Moscow. So much of who I am today is because of my time in that town. I remember hating it at first. Loving the fact that I was on my own and at the same time dreading the alarm in the morning. I remember working through so many insecurities in that town. From boys, to feuds with friends, to my own body sensitivities. I worked through so many obstacles, faced so many tough times, and trudged on so often when all I wanted to do was run away.

And then, the longer I was there, the more it really grew on me. I made some deep connections to the people there, it's where Nathan and I started dating and fell in love, as cliche as that sounds. It's basically where I grew up and grew into my adult self.

There's still so much growing and learning yet to do, and still so much ground I have yet to cover. But I still like to fantasize about what it would be like to go back to school and move down to that stupid little town that will forever hold this little part of my soul that lived and loved and painted and drew in that space between high school and adulthood.

Now my home is a little apartment on 4th street by Costco and instead of going to school everyday I go to work. It's a nice little routine and a great little life with so much in store for the future. So, I guess all that to say this: Halloween is awesome and change is good.

Happy Halloweener, kids. I hope you had a blast.