Tuesday, November 16, 2010

Love Hesitates (Fiction)

create a story based on this personification: love hesitates

He held the box in his hand, flicked open the lid to make sure the $278 white gold band complete with a princess cut diamond was still in its rightful place. He'd stared at the box, and the ring, too many times to count - to afraid to ask the question he was 90% sure of the answer for. The 'what ifs' were getting to him.

Sighing, he stood up from his bed, closing the box and placing it in the pocket of his black pea coat. It had been there for about a month, but the moment just never felt right. Maybe this type of thing is better off planned... he thought as he begrudgingly shut his dowdy apartment door behind him. He was going to meet her.

She was lovely. Every time she looked at him from across the table, she beamed. Her pearly whites were pearly as ever. He didn't know what to do but stare at her. He held her hand on top of the table as they were waiting for their food. Now is as good of a time as ever... But still, he couldn't bring himself to dislodge the little box from his pocket and show her his purchase. It just wasn't that simple.

He kissed her goodnight outside her door, lingering as long as he dared, putting off the inevitable. If he'd only ask her, then he wouldn't have to keep doing this - this whole goodnight deal. If he'd only ask her...if he'd only ask.

Certain that she'd give him the answer he wanted, he left her at her door and made his way back to his lonely, empty apartment. Her embrace had been so warm, her kisses so sweet. Why was this so hard? He wrestled with his inner thoughts as he lay in bed, ignoring the urge to get up and call her on the phone right that very second and tell her all the ways he loved her and that she should be his forever. He rolled over and closed his eyes.

The park was lovely. The air was crispy and slightly cold, typical of a perfect autumn day. The colored leaves were falling to the ground, and her blue jacket matched her eyes in the best way they could possibly ever compliment anything. He fingered the box in it's place inside his pea coat pocket, but still he was holding back.

She took his hand in hers and wrapped her fingers in the empty spaces between his. She looked at him and smiled, remarking how quiet he'd been all day. He smiled and shrugged and squeezed her hand. Inwardly, his heart was racing. With his free hand, he grabbed the box, but something shouted "NO! Not yet!" And he furrowed his brow a little as he released the box from his grasp.

"What's wrong?" she inquired, her voice sweet and syrupy. She always spoke in a sort of sing song voice that made him just want to do anything for her.

"Nothing, nothing," he lied, sensing that now would be a good time to make his move, but alas, it wasn't meant for this moment either. He was hesitating. He knew he was hesitating. He didn't know how to not hesitate.

"Are you sure? You look uncomfortable?" She stopped walking, jerking him to a halt on a grey stone path lined with deliciously golden leafed trees on either side. Park benches where beautifully old couples sat. The old men catching a bit of a nap and the old ladies spreading some bird crumbs for the stay-behind feathered friends who hadn't flown south yet.

Blood pressure elevated, sweat was starting to form on the edge of his hair line. He grabbed the box in his pocket and without waiting to think, he flicked open the lid. She gasped. He got on one knee.

Tears in her eyes, she looked at him, beaming, waiting for him to say the words she so desperately wanted to hear. He was choking on his words, so full of emotion, so surprised at himself. A month he had had this ring, a month he had been waiting for the right moment. A month was far too long, he thought.

"Will you..." he trailed off, not wanting his voice to crack. People were looking now, the old ladies hurriedly and excitedly elbowing their respective elderly gents to watch the spectacle that was about to unfold.

She nodded, not waiting for him to finish the question. He smiled and placed the lovely piece of jewelry on her delicate finger. As they embraced, the spectators cheered all doe eyed and happy. It was in that moment that he realized hesitation was the wrong answer, and that maybe, just maybe the spontaneous moments in life held the most joy.


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